View from across the pond - Week 3 in the NFL
A slightly better 8-7 performance last week - so if things going in this direction, then I might even be perfect by the end of the season. Time for another special set of features this week looking at alleged celebrity sighting of these teams' colours.
Kansas City Chiefs at Atlanta Falcons
MC Hammer was occasionally seen on the Atlanta sideline under Jerry Glanville as he tried to increase the profile of his team. Apparently he also asked Michael Stipe of R.E.M. who turned him down because he thought the Falcons were c**p. Pick: Atlanta.
Oakland Raydurs at Buffalo Bills
It's gotten so bad in Raider-land that even the Bloods and the Crips have banned their members from wearing the colours of Al Davis' team. Real men don't wear black anymore. Pick: Buffalo.
Carolina Panthers at Minnesota Vikings
One of the worst songs of all time was "Barbie Girl" by Aqua. What made it even worse was one of the lead singers cavorting round the stage on British television in a Kerry Collins' Panthers shirt in 1999. No excuse for the shirt or the song. Pick: Minnesota.
Miami Dolphins at New England Video Cheats
From bad songs to bad films. Dan Marino's performance in Ace Ventura was as bad as his last-ever NFL game (the 61-7 thrashing handed out by the Jaguars). This is the lock of the week. Pick: New England.
Cincinnati Criminals at Exit 16W off the Jersey Turnpike Giants
There must be something in this ex-Giants on TV lark. Michael Strahan has joined Tiki Barber in the media spotlight and the line goes all the way back to Frank Gifford. The Pink video for "Get this party started" has a dancer wearing a Peter Warrick' Bengals shirt. He was terrible too. Pick: NY Giants.
Houston Texans at Tennessee Titans
Of all the shirts being sported at Wembley Stadium last year for the Dolphins-Giants' game, I didn't see one for either the Texans or the Titans. And I can't think of any celebrity fans of the two franchise either. Pick: Houston.
Tampa Bay Buccaneers at Chicago Bears
Celebrity Buccaneer sighting from last weekend was Tiger Woods on the sideline at Raymond James Stadium. Rumour has it he was only there because he wants to play in the Bucs UK Golf days. Pick: Tampa Bay.
Arizona Cardinals at Washington Redskins
So the next celebrity Redskin fan will either be John McCain or Barack Obama depending on who wins the Presidential election. I just have this awful image of Sarah Palin as a Redskin cheerleader on the sideline. Pick: Washington.
New Orleans Saints at Denver Broncos
Too many NFL owners like to get themselves on TV these days (the over/under on Jerry Jones being on a sideline is about the 3rd quarter these days). But no-one could ever be more embarrassing than former Saints-owner Tom Benson dancing on the field with a parasol after the Saints made the playoffs in the late 1980s. Pick: Denver.
Detroit Ex-Buccaneers at San Francisco 49ers
The demise of the Bill Walsh glory years has seen Bay Area celebrities desert their associations rapidly in recent years. At least they had some - no Motown legend would ever be seen dead with the Lions. Pick: San Francisco.
St.Louis Lambs at Seattle Seahawks
Dick Vermiel's greatest moment was winning the Super Bowl. His worst one was having to kiss the late Georgia Frontiere on the field when they won it. An immediate reason to bar female sports owners (unless Cameron Diaz gets a team as in Any Given Sunday). Pick: Seattle.
Cleveland Browns at Baltimore Ravens
The most famous Cleveland fan has to be the guy in the Dog-mask who waves a bone at each game. If he took his show on the road to Carolina, he would probably pull some of the women down there. Pick: Baltimore.
Jacksonville Jaguars at Indianapolis Colts
Useless fact of the week - did you know the Jaguars' original logo was so similar to that of the Jaguar car symbol, that they had to re-design all their original merchandise? Pick: Jacksonville.
Pittsburgh Steelers at Philadelphia Eagles
I had a chance to see the famous Mean Joe Greene advert where he gives the little kid his shirt after a game. Nice touch. Now the kid would run straight off and sell it on e-Bay. Pick: Philadelphia.
Dallas Cowboys at Green Bay Packers
Did Brett Favre wear a Packers' jersey in "Something about Mary"? I gave up with that film because it was simply so bad. At least the Packers have a better actor at QB now. Pick: Dallas.
New York J-E-T-S Jets Jets Jets at San Diego Super Chargers
Anyone think Joe Namath has been barred from the sideline this Monday night in case he tries to snog another presenter? Time for the Chargers' powder-blue uniforms as sported in the Nelly & Kelly video for "Dilemma". Pick: San Diego.
Paul Stewart, The Tampa Tribune, 20 September 2008