Utter Shambles Well it was Thanksgiving and Christmas come early in Detroit last Sunday, and the Bucs were handing out all the presents they could. I know Rod Marinelli is an ex-Buc but I wasn’t aware that we were duty bound to gift wrap him an NFL game as part of his contract? To say I had steam coming out of my ears watching that horror show would be an understatement, some miscues are understandable but sadly last Sunday the Bucs seen to go out of their way in making the type of boneheaded errors an 0 and 7 team usually displays. If there was a way to kick yourselves in the goolies, we found it and the goaline balls up that led to Calvin Johnson’s TD was the coup de gras for me. The cat got booted, my toys went out of the pram and I fully spat my dummy out. Despite a desperate late TD, two of the bizarrest onside kicks I’ve ever seen and a rumoured Maurice Stovall sighting the damage was already done, and game that was ours for the taking had needlessly slipped away by our own hand. Gentlemen, you need to put this right with two home victories these next two weeks in what are eminently winnable games. Over to you. This week features the long awaited regular season NFL game that we’ve been waiting for, though quite why we need the gruesome sight of Martin Johnson and Didier Drogba in NFL uniforms, I don’t know. Drogba falls over with a gust of wind so surely a career as a running back in Miami beckons for him (arf). A few things I think 1. Nice article by Mike the Buc on Fantasy football, though I would differ on him on the point of avoiding irrational hatreds and picking Panther players. The Clap went 14-2 last season, and won the title and not one polluted Panther has ever darkened the franchise’s door – nor will they ever. Lee’s Fantasy Rule number 1 – all Panthers are shite, don’t touch them, period. 2. Dear Earnest Graham, when your team is playing like the shits and have effectively given a game away, and the clock is running, please don’t get up from a tackle with a big smile on your face – it really does grate with the Buccaneer faithful. Thanks - Lee, Manchester. 3. I think after that missed Field Goal last week, Matt Bryant is no longer my hero. 4. I think I can’t honestly pretend that Mike Clayton and Mark Jones injuries are any great loss on the scale of BK, Pittman or Cadillac’s. Clayton’s done diddly squat these past three years besides the odd decent block and silly hairstyle, whilst the Buc Kick-Off return TD’s still number the square route of zero. What great production will we be missing from these two – can someone remind me please? 5. I think Ray Lewis and Adalius Thomas would be far better suited to shutting their mouths and just playing the game. 6. (Should Be) Bucs Mantra for this week – DO NOT TURN THE DAMN THING OVER. 7. I think this is the week we take a Kick-off back to the house, it’s a feeling I have and I hope I'm right. I’ll be one of the 80 odd thousand spectators on Sunday at the national toilet, sorry Wembley, armed with £500 so I can afford to have a beer and a hot dog at the game at least and I can’t wait to hear the first question of “Why do they wear all those pads?” from someone in the crowd. Joking aside it will be great to see a meaningful regular season game in the UK, and just think if the Dolphins do go 0-16, we can say we saw them on the road to immortality. I’m not quite sure the NFL had a star trifeta of Cleo Lemon, Jesse Chatman and Marty Booker in mind when they scheduled this game but that’s how the cards have fallen for them. Everybody used to queue up to throw darts at the Bucs when we were this bad – and believe me, under Leeman Bennett we were actually worse – so I don’t have any great sympathy for them. Head on the Block Time Last week 10-4 (season 60-43 ) And it should be 61 but of course we know what happened in Detroit. Anyways this week’s names of the condemned are as follows … Da Bears (Lee’s take it to the bank, lock of the week) Oilers The Fudge Brownies Vikes G Men Peyton and his Friends Stillers Boy I Love Losing Superbowlers San Diego Super Chargers Buckos (of course) Aints Cheats and the Whiskeys. However you look at this game it will be a landmark event, and its got Giants win stamped all over it by at least 20 points. If the Dolphins can keep it close it will add to the spectacle but whatever the game brings, lets enjoy it for what it is – real football – and create an atmosphere without needing to resort to the grandma friendly wave which is vastly overrated. If anyone has ever seen the travelling England football team supporters response when a wave goes round an overseas venue, then you’ve got my attitude to a tee. Back to more important things and the Bucs game against the Jags, I’m hoping Gruden and the players are as steamed about last weeks debacle as I still am. We are playing an offensively challenged team with a back-up QB coming off the short week; what more could we have in our favour and if we can’t get up for this one we need to look at what the hell we are doing. The Bucs owe us all a performance after serving up a shit sandwich platter last Sunday - its there for the taking and thankfully we will do so 20-12, if not look out for me jumping off spaghetti junction. Nod of Acknowledgement to - Bridget Moynihan Aside from being the extremely attractive ex of Tom Brady and the mother of his son born back in September, it seems Ms Moynihan has a rather wicked sense of humour and original way to get her own back, whilst Mr Brady cavorts about the States with a new glamour model in tow. Surely someone else has noticed the full name Bridget has given to their son ….. John Edward Thomas Moynihan …. that’s right J E T Moynihan. A fine payback I’d say – well done young lady, I bet it amuses the Meadowlands faithful very much. Get in the Real World Award - The Miami Dolphins ……. Ouch, that injury to Ronnie Brown really does make this team a threat to our franchise record for a futile season. In fact if this lot go 0 for 16, they would actually top us. Lets hope they steal a game somewhere so we keep our unique status intact. Sports News Story I No Longer Give a Toss About – Boston Red Sox Sox in the World Series, Curt Schilling and his blooded sock, Manny and his sulks, Big (Fat) Papi etc etc. Yawn. If you Really Want To Puke Read This - articles like this explain just why 90% of NFL fans detest the Belicheats. Lets hope the Colts do the western world the biggest favour imaginable and kick their asses next week, and shut the media up.